Top Ten Things the Apostle Paul would have done if he had a pc

The Nigeria scams riled up one person enough to write a parody spam.

X-Spam-Status: No, hits=4.3 required=5.0
 tests=BILLION_DOLLARS,DEAR_SOMETHING,IN_REP_TO,ITS_LEGAL,
       LINES_OF_YELLING,LINES_OF_YELLING_2,LINES_OF_YELLING_3,
       NIGERIAN_TRANSACTION_1,NIGERIAN_TRANSACTION_2,REFERENCES,
       SIGNATURE_SHORT_DENSE,SPAM_PHRASE_05_08,SUPERLONG_LINE,
       UPPERCASE_75_100,USER_AGENT,USER_AGENT_MUTT,US_DOLLARS_3
 version=2.43
X-Spam-Level: ****

HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL 

FROM: GEORGE WALKER BUSH 
DEAR SIR / MADAM,

Have you ever noticed that the laws of household physics are every bit as real as every other law in the universe? Here are a few examples:

1. A child's eagerness to assist in any project varies in inverse proportion to the ability to actually do the work involved.

2. Leftovers always expand to fill all available containers plus one.

3. A newly washed window gathers dirt at double the speed of an unwashed window.

4. The availability of a ballpoint pen is inversely proportional to how badly it is needed.

5. The same clutter that will fill a one-car garage will fill a two-car garage.

Top Ten Things the Apostle Paul would have done if he had a pc:

10. Download MP3’s of the Righteous Brothers for entertainment while on those long, tedious missionary journeys.